I just want to rest...
Since I moved out of our house, I have never had a quality sleep. I've been haunted by empty dreams, almost always half-awake, dreaded the next dawning, hoping to relieve my self of immeasurable anxieties, performing at my worst, ran after by freaking inconveniences!
I am drained! Spiritually suffering, physically aging, psychologically drowning -- yes, every inch of it weakens my totality.
Endless nights of tearless lamentations... does anyone relate to the feeling, to the pain, to the unspeakable veracity of hurt and frustrations? Almost every hour of my day is spent on bended knees, unsurprisingly finding myself breaking down in tears, which at some point still wouldn't suffice the need to release the pain.
Leaving my comfort zone worsen the intensity of this inner struggle.
I miss my mom; though we may rarely talk heart-to-heart, just having her presence around is relief enough to this aching soul. At a single glance, without a word, she knew I was suffering...
Yes, I'm sobbing while typing this...
I don't need anyone to read this and blame me at the end -- NO. I don't need your words. I knew what I needed -- I KNEW what is lacking. I KNEW the Only ONE who can fill my heart with joy -- and I direly miss the intimate fellowship. And, I miss the comfort of being wrapped in His loving arms...
Dear heavenly Father, let me rest in you...
Since I moved out of our house, I have never had a quality sleep. I've been haunted by empty dreams, almost always half-awake, dreaded the next dawning, hoping to relieve my self of immeasurable anxieties, performing at my worst, ran after by freaking inconveniences!
I am drained! Spiritually suffering, physically aging, psychologically drowning -- yes, every inch of it weakens my totality.
Endless nights of tearless lamentations... does anyone relate to the feeling, to the pain, to the unspeakable veracity of hurt and frustrations? Almost every hour of my day is spent on bended knees, unsurprisingly finding myself breaking down in tears, which at some point still wouldn't suffice the need to release the pain.
Leaving my comfort zone worsen the intensity of this inner struggle.
I miss my mom; though we may rarely talk heart-to-heart, just having her presence around is relief enough to this aching soul. At a single glance, without a word, she knew I was suffering...
Yes, I'm sobbing while typing this...
I don't need anyone to read this and blame me at the end -- NO. I don't need your words. I knew what I needed -- I KNEW what is lacking. I KNEW the Only ONE who can fill my heart with joy -- and I direly miss the intimate fellowship. And, I miss the comfort of being wrapped in His loving arms...
Dear heavenly Father, let me rest in you...
