We'll Start Again

Many are the nights we've pondered so much on the love we have... until it drains us and it thirsts us.

The love is real and so are we. The more I think of what I am letting go, the more I feel empty. I stand before the reality that I am soon about to lose the most precious one I hold in my heart. Then again, I admitted, "I can't".

It was like slashing him with my sharp and careless words. I couldn't bear the thought that i brought him pain, the man that I love most. And as the conversation continues I can see that I am slowly weakening him and at the same time killing myself for I am internalizing the love that I can't stand losing. We were both suffering from pain...

The very reason our hearts beat is love... this healed the bruises brought about by unguarded words... taught the mind to forgive... smoothened the ego to submit... and once again blazed the heart with hopes that we can work it out... we'll start all over again.

Monday, July 28, 2008

Acceptance

It's analyzing with depth
Not hoping against nothing
It's realizing with acceptance
No deep remorse against failure.

Better it is that I understood
The way of the world
Hidden in the boxes of lives
Treasured by each individual.

Not that I'm not welcoming possibilities
I just let my faith lead me
Not being complacent at all
It's simply following the sacred call.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Running In Circles

This makes sense... because we're going nowhere.

This is like an endless game of hide and seek. When you feel like your direction is going nowhere, you're pretty much sure you're running in circles. Just like the relationship that has lost the trust you used to share. You keep on doubting... maliciously thinking that the other is cultivating something that is totally against the relationship. Continuous quarreling... it just doesn't seem to stop! Small nonsensical talks used to be sweet and flavorful amidst the content but it seems to have become burdensome.

You seem to give up along the way yet something keeps you holding on. Unnumbered times you wish to leave yet you're lingering like a child who wouldn't want to let go of a precious belonging.

This is me...

Pure Zai...

Monday, July 21, 2008